Have you ever got lost in a maze?
Without ever leaving your room,
Nor even leaving your bed.
Screaming wildly as I run
Into those same brick walls
Over and over.
If I can’t find a dead-end
I build a new one.
Burying me deeper and deeper
Within the straitjacket
Torture I desire.
Yet bleed out my agonies,
In blind terror
At what I have allowed to happen.
At how I have let these walls hem me in.
I scream, I beg, I fucking hate myself
Because I plead
To the Pillars of Authority,
As blind as the walls that entomb me
Within my pain.
While all around I hear torrents of abuse
“Failure, Embarrassment, Loser” they cry,
The disembodied voices from on high.
But one voice dissents,
One voice whispers
I call it Liar, I call it False Prophet,
Because it talks of being different.
It says I can be better.
If I just allowed myself to believe
In a horizon
That exists just outside my walls.
“Create your own path.” It counsels,
“Blast your way out of this maze.”
© 2018 | Frank Regan, All rights reserved.
Originally published 4 May 2015